There is this strange vortex between that e-mail, text, or call saying the idea is complete and the first time I see it or, actually, ride it. I’m actually underplaying it by calling it the doubt because what I feel is actually, without exaggeration, a foreboding sense of dread.
It’s not just about the financial investment, though there is that. But what if my idea turns out to be shit? The most doubt I’ve felt is around my Waltworks V2, even before I signed off on the geometry chart. The reason that it’s suspension-corrected, and I’ve ridden it extensively with a suspension fork, is that I really wasn’t certain that there was a point to a rigid bike so long and slack.
Certainly, my V1 opened up an extensive amount of North Shore terrain I hadn’t previously envisioned myself riding on a rigid rig – I was looking for the ultimate rig for the trails I was currently riding rigid, not to expand my rigid portfolio – and I needed to know how far I could take that experience, but what if there was no advantage to going longer and slacker yet?
Where V1 was complete the day I brought it home from Toxik Harald’s paint shop, V2 took much longer to make rideable. Not because I didn’t have all the parts – everything that went on V2 was used – but because psychologically I wasn’t ready.
A smaller investment, but I had the same feeling when Em let me know that my one-piece bar & stem was shipping (technically it’s three pieces – clamp, stem, and bar – brazed together). And despite all my (hilarious) friends’ (hilarious) jokes, no, I was not worried about it being “too much purple.” I’m not certain such a state exists.
What if I put it on and hated it? What if the shorter stem ended up being too short, or the sweep or roll didn’t work as expected. What if after a ride I buried it in a box and went back to running my excellent NSB/SQlab bar-stem setup?
I am not alone. I’ve talked to a pile of riders who’ve gone the custom route whether it’s ‘just’ a custom build on a stock frame, or ‘just’ paint, or a bag or widget, or it’s a full-on custom frame. When there’s a significant outlay of passion and pennies and a degree or centimeter can make a massive difference to how something rides there will always be doubt.
The good news is this stage is called the completion because for better or worse your new bag, bit, or bike is on the way. When it comes, you can choose how honest you are with yourself about how you like it, but in any event, that sh*t is yours now.