Beer and Loathing in Lost MEATengines
MEATengines is, for the moment, working properly-ish again. At least the front end has been more consistent, and now the backend is, fingers crossed, recovered-ish from one frustration after another. After being extorted to pay more money for what I already had, I was told it would take up to 24 hours to fix something that then took north of two days; here we are, Saturday night, with Some Bicycles Things I’m Stoked About On A Friday for the 28th of August 2026.
Through it all, I’m somewhere around 92% certain that the people I’ve spoken to at GoDaddy’s customer service department were, well, actually people. On the support chat? It drops to about 35%. Lower every time. Either folks are working off a tight script that makes them read like a computer’s best approximation of a real person, or A.I. customer service is just transferring me up the chain to ever more pseudo-empathetic but equally vapid and futile A.I. customer service. Either way, the answer in text is consistently “you’ll hear back within 24hrs” and the answer in voice is “the team just needs a couple of hours more,” and the reality, days later, is neither. It ‘just’ started working again-ish. Thank you‽
And, while I’m not looking to post life-changing health advice, or, actually, doing anything more serious than musing about bicycles, I do find myself sitting here big-thinking, wow, actually, do androids dream of electric sheep? No, really, because so, so many companies are total shite, I do think we need a ‘Blade Runner’ law, with teeth, where it is beyond clearly labelled whether the ‘voice’ on the other end is a person or a computer. It shouldn’t be legal for A.I. customer service, voice or text, to escalate folks to the A.I. customer service ad infinitum; rather, we should codify that all businesses must have live human representatives, and the simple phrase or word “Human” should require that the caller, texter, e-mailer, or messenger be transferred to one.
And when I say teeth, I mean, we know that as the technology improves, parallel to the enshitification of all things that the shiftier companies will all try to cheat in order to avoid having actual people on their payrolls. So when whoever, but probably Bell-Telus-Rogers all at the same time, are busted for their nine-levels deep all-A.I. customer service department, they should instantly have to hire one person from the employment insurance rolls, at a living wage, for minimum one year for every offence. For every one hundred offences they should also have to build a swimming pool or skating rink in an underserved community, the sort of infrastructure support for the we used to expect massive companies to do, for the populations that support them, with some of their profits, without being forced.
{Photo by Tom Mackesy.}
Park Bagging
I’m doubly stoked about Park Bagging. First of all, it sounds like a great time cruising from park to park at a chill pace with other bicycle people. The stated goal of the ride group is “Enjoying a beverage in every Vancouver park” and the pace is inclusive, and that’s lovely. But, even more thana that, I’m stoked that a few people, rather than ‘the algorithm’ sent me links to the PB Instagram with the belief that I would be into it. Yes, I am. No, I haven’t been on a Park Bagging ride, but it’s on my list and with some 215 parks to visit at a chill pace I’m confident I’ll make it happen before they run out.
Whether you’re Vancouver adjacent and decide to ride, or living somewhere else and take this on as inspiration to bag some parks in your own hometown, I’m stoked about it:
{Above photo by @parkbagging.}
As goes mountain bikes, so goes the world.
I know in my heart that in my lifetime, or, at least, within the expected lifetime of someone my age, there will be a massive counterpunch to the constant marketing beat of faster-and-easier-and-faster-and-easier-and-faster-and-easier. Eventually people will yawn, and stand, and stretch, and say “BORING!” An experience robbed of its provenance and process isn’t endowed with any meaning. Instant art is like instant coffee. I understand, it can do the job. Need a business logo or a caffeine bump? Boom, here you go. But I want my espresso drawn two shots at a time and my trail gnome stickers drawn by Nigel Quarless.
Friday I went for a lovely ride up No Quarter on Fromme and, despite being one of my shorter ‘full’ loops arrived home much later than expected. Was their some bullshitting? Yes. Was I riding super slow up and down? Also, yes. But cranking my single-speed up, coasting it down, bumping the hardtail about as smoothly as my abilities allow was beautiful. We received some proper rain this week and the trails were wonderful. I added a few psi to my, budget friendlier, suspension fork and I almost feel like we’ve bracketed into our best settings compromise. Mountain bicycling, stoked, it’s my favourite.
On a related note, I’ve had the song ‘Suffer’ by Boy Golden stuck in my head, all day, for a few days now and I would have bet you money the line in the chorus is “We all suffer / Riding our ordinary bikes / Riding our ordinary bikes / We all suffer.” Apparently, I am mistaken?
{Photo by Andrew.}
{Above photo by Ride Ritual.}
Wrenching Work at VMBC
If I lived in the ‘Wack I’d ride the wicked-awesome climbing trail that is Kerry’d Away at least once a week. Probably twice most weeks. And the first place I’d ask for some hours, turning wrenches or on the floor, is Vedder Mountain Bike Co. Sure, I only peripherally know them, but, I mean, they’re Dumpster Bear Recommended!* Plus, they have a fantastic industry reputation as a shop and as people. As we’ve apparently re-entered the bad old days of seasonal shop jobs** and the accompanying layoffs, here they are in almost-September hiring for a Service Manager/Head Mechanic full time so their shop will be dialed and ready to go when the next riding season hits.
Even if you subscribe to my friend Andrea’s belief that, when it comes to bike shops, “All the world is a tiny village” I personally know a pile of folks turning wrenches who could use a fresh start in a rad environment close to good trails, and you might be one of them. I swear I’m not just looking for a driveway to camp in so I can double my riding days for the same drive when I say, if you do make the move let me know and we can put together an interview for my long stalled Cogs In The Machine series!
*{“You can’t buy your way into a Dumpster Bear Recommendation, and it would be beyond gauche to ask. Either you’re DBR or you’re not and to be honest, I don’t know the formulation for the exact witches brew of knowledge, caring, and genuine friendliness that is required to get the tap on your shoulder.“}
**{I know some very good techs who were laid off last winter for their first time in a decade, or ever.}
{Photo by Nic Shain.}
{Photo by Andrew.}
The Future of Cable-Actuated Dropper Posts
A tidal wave of options in increasingly cheap future-garbage electronic dropper posts are on their way and I’m here to tell you, hold on, they aren’t the answer. I mean, unless if you like turfing unsupported crap and supporting cynical people hawking it. You see, where there are cheapish-and-cheerful {AKA best of the budget-friendlier}, solidly reliable, cable-actuated dropper posts like the PNW Range and X-Fusion Manic that win sales on price, when it comes to more premium options I’m certain what most folks love is not so much babysitting two batteries* but the ultra-light, no-throw, instantaneous action.
So, what the future of cable-actuated dropper posts, premium but also more plain, needs is just that. The lightest action, but not simply from running a long-ass remote lever for more leverage, because the system also needs the shortest possible throw. It’s a remote pulling an easily changeable cable with the most light-action electronically-instant feeling possible. And, at the more premium lever, we’re talking a heavenly light feel in a fully-rebuildable post you can ride forever for significantly less scratch than the premium electronic models. This is beyond possible.
Imagine throws so short and action so light that your dropper remote is positioned where it’s most ergonomically actuated, not based on the length of throw or initial force required. Sounds wonderful n’est ce pas? Stoked for lightest-action short-throw cable-actuated future.
*{It’s amazing how many folks are shocked to learn there’s also a battery in the remote.}
{Photo by Andrew.}
Abbey Tools Post Mount Cleaner Upper
Abbey Tools calls this a ‘post mount facer’ but compared to other tools for the application that may be a little ambitious. Rather than facing post mounts relative to each other and a frame or fork axle, this little beauty is cleaning them up relative to the threads. Still, with so, so many forks selling for closer to CA2K than one that have a glob of paint at the top of each post, this tool should make a magical difference to brake alignment, noise, and ensuring full rotor contact that I can’t imagine that every shop in town won’t have one. I mean, I’ve used an OLFA knife, small file, sand paper, and the power of imagination {imagining the paint uneven glob of paint isn’t there and just tightening the caliper} but this tool looks like it would be faster, easier, and better than any of those other methods. I’ll be stoked to try one once some shops I know have it in stock.
Abbey is sold out at the moment but there will be more inventory in mid-October and they are taking backorders, either directly or through your preferred local shop.
{Above photo by Abbey Tools.}
Climbmax
I want to reiterate that all the awful, ‘original’ MEATengines ‘art’ you see here, Dumpster Bear Says and otherwise, was made by me using good old MS Paint. All the genuinely quality art that I share is not made by me, but rather by talented folks, and will include attribution and links to the original source. Same with ideas. Photographs, whether they’re good ones I’ve borrowed or my own that I’ve shared were taken by humans. And that the thoughts you read here, written by me or otherwise, spelling mistakes and all, are put down by people. MEATengines has a no A.I. policy and I’m trying me best to live up to that.
Any thoughts or concerns you know where to find me.
Larry Talker Tunes, by Andrew
2023’s Rockstar was Dolly Parton’s 49th studio album. The story goes that she believed in earning her turns so after being entered into the Rock’n’Roll Hall of Fame in 2022 as someone who had influenced an untold number of artists, Mrs. Parton felt compelled to create an album that fit the genre. Have the cart, might as well own a horse too.
I read a fair few tributes after her passing this week, and I, more than the music, I wanted to share this particular entry by Steve Garro of Coconino Bikes renown:
“That a single person should be so unanimously beloved and cherished for being kind, magnanimous, generous, caring, inclusive, open, humble, self-deprecating and just generally herself should show us all how uncommon these traits and virtues have become and that we all can agree to the fact that that’s what we respect and it’s what inspires us.
So maybe we should all work on that.
And read a book while you’re at it.
Dolly would approve.“
Anywho, despite selling a fair few copies, and the fact that I really enjoy some Dolly Parton staples, I’d never listened to this album before. Rockstar is a combination of 21 covers and 9 original tracks and fits easily within our 10-year rule for LTT.
I really enjoyed her covers of Satisfaction, I Hate Myself For Loving You, Magic Man, and Night Moves. Well, and all the rest of them. Of the original songs, World On Fire is rock solid.
Thank you, Dolly.
{Photo by Dolly Parton}
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