MEATengines

From Zero to Three Chromags*

Monday Musings (32) – Fleeting Discussions

As we’re sorting things out for this year’s Cumberlandworx trip, it’s not lost on me that “Wow, Nice Chromag!” has gone from a MEATy inside joke to a seemingly family-wide endorsement of the crotch-grabbing-bear brand. Made that much more visual and visceral by the fact that The Clairebarian and Nina both love their ‘Superb Ratchet Shorts‘, and all three of us wear their Habit glove model. 

So, the joke. Despite its 29″ wheels and dual disc brakes, my Waltworks V1, with its rigid-specific geometry and pink-and-purple Toxik Harald dirty fade, garnered constant comments about its assumed advanced age. “Wow, that’s an old bike to ride on the shore. I had an ’89 Ritchey!” I would explain to random riding folks almost every ride that it was relatively new. Then, with the next double-hardtail, none meaner, the fully truculent V2 with its Cosmic-Lilac powder coat, for whatever reason, the comments shifted to:

“WOW, NICE CHROMAG! I didn’t know they made bikes with rigid forks?!“

*{Drewitors aside below}

Cumberlandworx 2022: Since then, my V2 reached its EOL. Nina's Waltworks is in temporary {?} retirement while she sag-wagons. Claire outgrew her awesome Marin SQ24.
Cumberlandworx 2022: Since then, my V2 reached its EOL. Nina’s Waltworks is in temporary {?} retirement while she sag-wagons. Claire outgrew her awesome Marin SQ24.
Cumberlandworx 2024: My V2, mulleted. Nina's Waltworks with a bunch of fresh bits. Claire's new-to-her 2020 Chromag Samurai. One {actual} Chromag counted.
Cumberlandworx 2024: My V2, mulleted. Nina’s Waltworks with a bunch of fresh bits. Claire’s new-to-her 2020 Chromag Samurai. One {actual} Chromag counted.

If it had happened just the once, it would have probably still generated years of guffaws. But I’ve been complimented on my ‘Chromag’ so many times I started to wonder if one of my friends was putting people up to it. I mean, long-ass chainstays, swinging dropouts, rigid fork, Waltworks sticker on the downtube, no metal headtube badge, I can’t pretend that it ever made sense to me. Why not assume it’s a Kona? It looks more like a Unit than anything from the bear-aware bicycle company. 

At some point, it became so that when folks would look at V2 and say “Nice Chromag,” I’d have to watch them a while before responding. For most people, it was an honest assumption, but when the face starts to tilt up into a smile, I know it’s a friend-of-a-friend or the rare MEATengines reader taking the piss.

Claire, back in action on her ever increasingly not-too-big 2020 Samurai.
Claire, back in action on her ever increasingly not-too-big 2020 Samurai.

[Aside]

Ah, the eternal N+1 debate on whether to count predominantly bicycles-for-transportation in the same list as predominantly bicycles-for-fun. Oh, and how often to measure data points. For example, if I ride my Freeride BMX to work more hours than I ride it in the forest one week, does that move it into the commuter category? How do I even count the SRT {Steve’s Ruined Talbot}, which I ride on the road for fun, but usually it’s linked up to an errand? 

Anywho, I would have counted Nina’s old Chromag Sakura if it were still built up as a mountain bike. But, in any non-pedalable state, it’s not a bike {frames don’t count towards N+1, right?}, and in its WZRD-renewed life as a commuter rig, surely it belongs in a separate bicycles-for-transportation list?!

So, according to Team NJP, we have four Chromags in the house. And both in its current state, where no wheels equals not a bike, and in its future state as a commuter-ATB, I say we only have three. 

[/Aside]

Prior to Claire's Samurai, Nina's 26" wheeled, 1-1/8" headtubed, Sakura was the only Chromag any of us had owned. This was the final 1x off-road refresh featuring the low-gears that launched OneUp.
Prior to Claire’s Samurai, Nina’s 26″ wheeled, 1-1/8″ headtubed, Sakura was the only Chromag any of us had owned. This was the final 1x off-road refresh featuring the low-gears that launched OneUp.

So when it comes to our modern era, mountain biking with the kid, Claire’s was the first Chromag on the scene. It could have been any number of different rad hardtails, newer than 2020 or 2019, even, in size small, 26″ or 27″, dependent entirely on the used market at the time. 

Originally, her next bike was going to be a 27/26 mini-mullet consisting of a new 44mm headtube and slacker head tube angle (HTA) torched onto Nina’s old Sakura. But, for whatever reason, at the time, there was a flood of nice, used, dual-27″ hardtails available for fair prices and, for all the reasons, the Samurai was the next-bike winner. 

For Claire, it came in her favourite colour. For me, it had dialed geometry, the Mike Truelove made-in-Squamish story, and it was in fantastic condition for being a few years old. It did require some minor multi-hacksaw-blade surgery, and, as many folks have noted, an aluminum frame would be notably lighter, but it was the perfect rig for the moment and remains such to date. 

Claire's Samurai is back to multi-speed, but she has pitched bringing the necessaries to ride both setups in Cumberland.
Claire’s Samurai is back to multi-speed, but she has pitched bringing the necessaries to ride both setups in Cumberland.
I've previously ridden Cumberland with a suspension fork a few times before, but I'm keeping my single-speed streak alive.
I’ve previously ridden Cumberland with a suspension fork a few times before, but I’m keeping my single-speed streak alive.

My own well-used Chromag was even more of a happy accident. We actually needed a bike for Claire when we bought her Samurai, but between my V2, the El Roy ‘Marinster Truck,’ and the Banshee Freeride BMX, the last thing I was looking for was another addition to “the hardtail farm,” as Nina calls it. Especially a hardtail without sliding dropouts for ISCG tabs for one-speeding. Especially a hardtail with a bottom bracket so low that the only MX’ing of the wheels that could happen is a 29+/29 mega-mini-mullet setup. 

But Will was trying to part with his impossible-to-sell, one-of-a-kind, amazing paint job, Truelove-made 2019-ish Arcturian 29+ frame, and I was looking for an interesting next step in a BikeMag series I was working on called Secondhand Postilions that no brands were interested in supporting. A deal was worked out for the fourth-hand-me-down Spire I was riding.

Out in the wild, I've had some nice compliments on my rattle-can Lilac paint work. My secret is to not let folks examine it from too closely. {Ha}
Out in the wild, I’ve had some nice compliments on my rattle-can Lilac paint work. My secret is to not let folks examine it from too closely. {Ha}

Now, in terms of Cumberlandworx, I’ve never ridden a multi-speed bike north of Victoria, and even that was in the last millennium. It’s a personal streak I enjoy, so the over-forked and GeoShifted Arcturian, as much fun as it is, never would have received the invite if it weren’t for FLT {F!rst L!ght Thomas} firing on some sliders for me. 

A change, I’ll note, that has bumped my Chromag up to the top step in terms of what mountain bike I’m grabbing on any given day. Indeed, the strangest thing happened on my last ride with Model-T, where we both left our rigid bikes at home and he rode his Honzo and I the ArctuHawk. 

Between the beefcake tubeset, 38mm fork, and CushCored 3″ tires, this bike is an absolute beast, and I’m still not running at full-juice, but with the 28x22t gearing, I’m confident I’ll be able to pedal the whole trip. 

Other than the addition of the Boostinator kit and narrower tire for the rear wheel, and a shorter stem, all the parts from Nina's Waltworks transferred over to the Minor Threat.
Other than the addition of the Boostinator kit and narrower tire for the rear wheel, and a shorter stem, all the parts from Nina’s Waltworks transferred over to the Minor Threat.

So, despite whatever level of hardtail holdoutedness we can be accused of, and Chromag being locally synonymous with hardtails, Nina is the only person in the household who has owned a new one. Twice, even. One of those from the days when 1-1/8″ headtubes and 27.2 seat posts were still common on mountain bike frames, and the other one a full-squish!

A full-squish bike that we bought because it’s dialed for short riders with room for a proper dropper post, dual 27″ wheels, and rad geo in a shorter travel package. And also because it checked all the boxes in terms of component compatibility, a high-quality aluminum frame, and even has external brake routing. 

I don't know that there's a better all-around sag wagon for properly short riders. In any material, at any price point. I'd hear arguments for the Knolly Endorphin, but, in our case, too many components didn't transfer.
I don’t know that there’s a better all-around sag wagon for properly short riders. In any material, at any price point. I’d hear arguments for the Knolly Endorphin, but, in our case, too many components didn’t transfer.

Yeah, so. I fully admit that we own, and like, a bunch of Chromag stuff. Fits well, works well, lasts well. It’s a localish company and, yes, not the soft goods, but they do try to produce some of their products here in BC. Including three of the four bike frames we have. But, we like plenty of gear from other brands too! And, bike-wise, most of the rigs are simply a case of right place, right time.

I bristle, I’m pre-bristling, at any narrative of fanfolkism even though our whole family has matching head tube badges for this year’s Cumberlandworx. Claire and I are both riding five-plus-year-old frames acquired used, and many {most} of the best values {geo, build, quality, price} for hardtails on the local used market were, are, and I’m sure will remain Chromags. 

I know a few folks, and their kids, riding used rigs from the Whistler bike brand. Especially for those searching for a 27″ wheel rig, there’s a certain inevitability from the fact that Kona didn’t produce an Explosif ESD and most other brands went dual-29″ on all sizes. 

And that’s what I’m musing about on this Monday.

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